


And I Believe In A Crystal Light

by slytherclaw13



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Bipolar Disorder, Bipolar Phil, Freeform, M/M, Vignette, bipolar, worried Dan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-28 23:00:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6349021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slytherclaw13/pseuds/slytherclaw13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The days when he's up are the best days.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And I Believe In A Crystal Light

The days when he’s up are the best days. So much gets done, the sex is amazing, and there isn’t so much as a single sock crumpled up on the coffee table. When Phil is up, everything is overtly wonderful. He's quick witted and giggly, and Dan can't help but smile and think back to when they first met-when eternity stretched ahead of them, knowing that no matter what happens this wonderful, soaring feeling could be with them forever. After all, their best memories have come from a splash of mild mania: their first kiss on the Manchester Eye, Phil is Not On Fire-even their trip to Japan (Phil surprised him, last minute, with a fully planned trip to his favorite place in the world! Dan was so overwhelmed with glee he barely noticed Phil’s hands fidgeting just a bit too fast at his sides).

Of course, euphoria has a tendency to turn to delirium. They start videos for the gaming channel and never finish them. Editing takes a backseat to whatever passing fancy overtakes Phil for the evening. Bad decisions pile up with opened amazon packages, filled with more candles than could conceivably be lit and more and more goddamn houseplants.The typical upbeat cadence of his voice slurs into a run on sentence of massive proportions- _heyguysitsaboutfouramandicantsleepawinkhopeyourereadyforanothersleeplessnightwithphil_ -Dan can only exhale when he’s sure Phil’s started to breathe again. Keeping things tidy turns into sorting Dan’s shirts by shades of black at four in the morning, with nothing for him to do but watch and worry and hope Phil will tire himself out soon enough. Their dream trip to Tokyo turns into 24 missed calls, and pacing back and forth in foreign hospitals because _of course_ Phil decided that  _right now_ was the best time to wander alone into the red light district.

And yet, Dan’s not sure which is worse: when Phil soars too close to the sun, or the inevitable fall that follows. When he won’t make a video, or eat, or leave the house for weeks on end. When there are too many nights of tears and quiet, always followed by “I’m sorry…I’m sorry. God, why am I like this? What the hell is wrong with me, Dan?” When the only thing he can do is hold on, and hold him, and wait for things to get better.

Assuming, of course, that they ever will.

**Author's Note:**

> hello all! this is my first ever fic and I'd love some feedback :)  
> the title is from Modern Chemistry by Motion City soundtrack.


End file.
